Definition
by jevees
Summary: This fanfics follows the last episode of the second Season og TG, this is my point of view about how it`s gonna begin the third season of this great show. Hope you like it!


Definiton It was late and the little lights shone as usual that cold Friday night in Pittsburgh while attorney Nick Fallin was sitting in the middle of the ER at County Hospital, waiting for some news and remembering what he had lived through the past few hours.  
  
It all began when his father got out of the car and insisted on fighting the guy who took the only parking space left.  
  
Burton got out of the car and started talking to the other man in not a very gentle way. Then they started to shove each other and Nick decided to intervene, even though he knew it wasn't such a great idea.  
  
Nick said, "Hey." and punched the guy so hard that he couldn't feel his hand for awhile. Then he just lost it.  
  
He didn't even notice when the guy fell; he just continued to punch him again and again. Finally he stopped and realized what he had done. He looked at the guy and was suddenly overwhelmed. Burton continued to kick the man as he lay, helpless, on the floor.  
  
A moment later they were leaving the garage as quick as possible; Nick checking for security cameras or a witness who could have seen the horrifying thing they had done, but he saw nothing.  
  
They got in the car and a minute later they were on the street.  
  
Nick breathed as much air as he could, still trying to figure out what the hell was wrong with him: his hands and body were asking him to stop. He should send help to the poor guy but he didn't do it. He looked at his dad, who was reaching for a cigarette, wanting to know what he was thinking.  
  
Then he saw a man running down the middle of the street. As the man passed by the car, Nick recognized him. Taliek seemed desperate, staring at him with a weird expression in his eyes. Nick felt a chill. He continued to watch Taliek in his rear-view mirror, with an eerie feeling.  
  
After he left his dad at home, he still had a bad feeling about Taliek so he parked the car and took a cab to LSP. Something was wrong and somehow he knew James was involved.  
  
He went inside the elevator and pressed the button for the second floor as usual. While he was waiting to arrive he thought about the man bleeding in the parking garage and felt his pain rise again. He also remembered how he had run out that evening after Lulu had said she didn't know how to respond to his words, he had said to her that he loved her, he remembered that he hadn`t said those words to a woman since his mother died . He knew that what he felt at that moment wasn't only guilt or frustration. All that had happened these past weeks had driven him nuts-Lulu wanting to go away. He really couldn't blame her; maybe it was best for her to stay the hell away from him. And then there was his father with all the Shannon stuff which was driving him insane. He had wondered, since the very moment his dad wanted to be her foster parent, what she had that he didn't. His father never showed him as much devotion as he showed to Mary Gressler´s granddaughter.  
  
Everyone he cared about seemed to abandon him. It happened before when his mom died and his father decided to send him away. He felt, as much as he tried, he was losing everything again.  
  
The elevator door opened and he went inside. Then he saw him-the new lawyer lying on the floor. Nick ran to assist him but then he saw the blood and the hole in his head. He took his pulse, knowing, already, that he was dead. Then he turned and noticed the other man, trying to reach the telephone.  
  
"My God. James. James." Nick said.  
  
Nick grabbed James carefully and took his pulse. It was weak but he was alive. He took the phone that James was trying to reach and dialed 9-1-1, giving the operator the address and other specifications and then he turned his attention to James. He had his eyes open but he was having difficulty breathing. Nick noticed the two wounds, apparently gun shots. One was in his chest. Hopefully the bullets hadn't struck any vital organs. He took his jacket off to try and stop the bleeding as much as he could.  
  
James was now mumbling . "Nick. It was. him. his eyes. You know this shirt is new. God, how could he.? Mmm. Who could blame him? Can I? I deserved this. I."  
  
Nick started to panic. James' pulse was getting weaker.  
  
"James, shut up. Nobody deserves this." 'Except maybe me,' he thought. "Come on, save forces. Okay? You are gonna be okay."  
  
His breathing was getting worse. Nick prayed he wouldn't collapse before the paramedics got there. They'll know what to do.  
  
Nick kept trying to stop the bleeding. He knew James had lost a lot of blood and he just was hoping someone would arrive soon. The elevator was called from downstairs. Nick hoped it would be help. He looked at James and thought of the man in the parking garage, bleeding-lying there, maybe not as lucky to be found by someone. He felt guilty all over again.  
  
Holding his jacket against James he realized he was angry with himself. A long time ago he thought he was angry with his father for not making time for him, for not loving him, but the truth was that he hated himself for not being able to be what his father deserved. what lulu deserved. He hated himself so much for not being good enough for the people he loved.  
  
The doors of the elevator suddenly opened and a group of people entered the room.  
  
Nick shouted, "We're in here. He needs help." He was grateful for being pulled out of his thoughts.  
  
The paramedics approached and started working on James. Nick felt relief because James was now in the hands of professionals and he didn't have to save him; it wasn't his responsibility anymore. 'At least he didn't die in my hands,' he thought. Another paramedic went to see about the new guy at LSP-he was dead and Nick knew it. He hadn't even said hello to the guy. Maybe he has a family. Nick didn't even know if he was married, maybe with a couple of children.  
  
Five minutes later Nick was in the ambulance trying to figure this whole thing out. How had this happened? When was this day ever going to end?  
  
They arrived at the hospital and immediately took James to surgery. His condition was very bad so Nick decided to call Alvin and as soon as he arrived Nick was going to get the hell out of there. He couldn't stop thinking about what he had done before he found James. Nick couldn't close his eyes without seeing the man's face covered with blood. His own hands, in fact, were covered with blood now. Not only James' but also the blood of a stranger; the man he had beaten up earlier that evening. He felt ashamed.  
  
He asked the nurse in the reception area if he could make a quick call. He indicated to her that his cell phone was broken and he needed to talk to someone about what had happened. Another stupid thing he had done because he just couldn't handle his anger.  
  
What was happening to him? He had been angry since he was twelve-angry with his mother for leaving him alone and with his father for sending him away and trying to forget he ever existed. And he was angry with himself for not being the kind of son that his father would have wanted at his side. 'Angry could be his middle name,' he thought, sadly.  
  
Alvin's phone rang. It was 11:30 PM. Alvin was reading an incredible book titled "How not be a Fascit". He grabbed the phone wondering who it could be at that late hour.  
  
"Hello," he answered.  
  
"Alvin, hey it's Nick.."  
  
"Nick. God, what's going on? Do you know what the time is Mr. Fallin.?"  
  
"Yeah. Alvin, I'm. sorry. Listen." Alvin began to be alarmed.  
  
"Are you okay? Are you in trouble? Where are you?"  
  
"At County Hospital. You know, you should come. There's this."  
  
"What? In the hospital. Nick, are you all right? What happened? Accident? God, Nick, speak!"  
  
"No, no, it's not me. Just get dressed and come down here. Something happened at LSP and James. He's injured and well, the new guy. I don't even remember his name. Just. just. come, okay? We'll talk as soon as you get here."  
  
The phone went dead. Alvin got up and started to get dressed. He was trying to understand what Nick was trying to say. He knew something bad had happened. Nick would never have called if it wasn't important but. what? He got his car keys and stormed out of the little apartment he called home.  
  
Twenty minutes later he arrived at the hospital. He went in looking for the reception area to ask for some information, but then he saw Nick. He was sitting in the ER, his hands covering his face. Alvin called to him, loudly.  
  
"Nick." Nick didn't move. He seemed to be in a trance.  
  
Alvin got closer and grabbed his shoulder. "Nick," he said again. Nick shook his head a bit and looked at him, staring.  
  
"Alvin? Hi. I'm sorry I bothered you at this hour. I didn't know who to call."  
  
Alvin saw the strange look on Nick's face. He also saw the red knuckles, but said nothing about them. He was more concerned about James and Larry.  
  
"What happened at the clinic? James and Larry. Are they okay?  
  
"Well..." Nick felt an acrid taste in his mouth. "James is in surgery and this guy. the new one."  
  
"Larry?"  
  
"Is that his name.? 'Cause you introduced him to me but I was kind of busy and well."  
  
"What about him?" Alvin prodded Nick. 'God, what's going on?' he thought.  
  
"He's dead. I'm sorry, Alvin. I thought I should call his family. it's just that I didn't get his name and I just couldn't call anyone. And." Nick stopped as he saw Alvin's face become pale. Was he going to faint? Nick hated being here. He hated the situation. Why did he have to be the one to discover them?  
  
"Alvin . hey," he said, touching his arm. "Are you okay? Alvin?"  
  
"No, Nick. I'm not okay. Someone died at my clinic. How do you think I feel about that?"  
  
"I'm. sorry. When I arrived. he. he. was already dead. There was nothing that I could have done."  
  
Alvin was feeling like hell. He was treating Nick like it was his fault.  
  
"It's okay," he said, trying to calm himself. "Can you tell me exactly what happened? Have you heard anything how about James?"  
  
"James is in surgery, he was shot twice, I ."  
  
"Shot? What are you talking about?"  
  
"He. they both were shot. I arrived and found them there lying on the floor. I saw this guy, Larry. He had. he was. shot in the head. I. there was so much blood," Nick continued, emotionally. "I took his pulse but he didn't have any.so. then I saw James. He was trying to get to the phone, and."  
  
Alvin was listening carefully at all that Nick was saying, then suddenly he spoke firmly and little bit loud.  
  
"Did you see anyone. inside. outside. anything?"  
  
Nick shook his head then ran his hand down the back of his head. "No. there wasn't anyone, or at least I didn't see anything, you know?" Nick said, frustrated. "I was a little worried about James bleeding out. I tried to stop it but he had two wounds: one in the chest and the other near his shoulder. I. tried to cover the one in the chest first. I thought."  
  
"It's ok, Nick. I'm sorry. Why don't you go home and get some sleep? I'll stay and call the relatives of both and. Just go and rest. Do you want me to call your father?"  
  
"No, no. that's not. No."  
  
Alvin was a little surprised by Nick's reaction. He could be a very strange man sometimes.  
  
"Are you okay? You seemed."  
  
"I'm fine. Don't worry about me."  
  
"Yeah, you don't need anyone," Alvin said, using Nick's own words.  
  
Stung by Alvin's remark, Nick said, "So. are you calling Larry's relatives or what?"  
  
Noticing the hurt in Nick's eyes, Alvin straightened up a bit and said. "Yes, I'm doing that right now."  
  
"Okay, so I'll wait until you come back. Do you want me to do something? Anything.?" Nick added, hopelessly.  
  
"Can you call Lulu and tell her everything that happened, so she can warn everyone not go to the office and.?"  
  
Although Nick had avoided talking to Lulu, at that moment he realized Alvin was going to make the worst phone calls so he agreed to call Lulu but, he was not looking forward to it.  
  
Nick blamed himself again for smashing his cell phone and went in search of a public one he could use. While he was walking toward it he was thinking how Lulu would react to his call. He dialed and waited for her to answer.  
  
"Hello," she said.  
  
"Hi, Lulu."  
  
"Nick, is that you? Today, after you left, I wanted to talk to you but."  
  
"I'm not calling you about that. There was this problem at LSP. Alvin needs you here."  
  
"Okay. Well. maybe he should call his friend James." Now Alvin needed her, after he practically sold her to his friend in California, she thought to herself.  
  
Surprised by her reaction, Nick said, "He can't Lulu. James was shot and he's in the hospital. So."  
  
"Oh, God." She felt so ashamed. "I'm sorry. What happened? How?"  
  
"Someone shot James and Larry and. Look we are at County Hospital. Why don't you just.?"  
  
"Are they okay? My God. How can I help?"  
  
"Just come here and Alvin will explain."  
  
"But who.? Who would do such a horrible thing? I mean everyone likes James and."  
  
Nick was no longer hearing her. He was thinking about that night. He knew there was something that he was forgetting. Then he remembered Taliek running and his eyes."  
  
"Are you listening to me, Nick.? Nick?"  
  
"I have to go. Come as soon as you can. I don't want Alvin to be here alone. Would you? Sorry... I have to go." He hung up.  
  
Lulu looked at the phone shocked by what she had just heard. She was already dressed. Grabbing her car keys and cell phone, she left.  
  
During the drive she called Laurie and the police. She passed by the LSP office but the police were there and no one could get in. She drove to the hospital.  
  
Nick returned to the waiting room still thinking about Taliek. He knew it must have been him who did this. Taliek had a good motive and then there were James' words. Nick was putting things together but he just couldn't accuse the guy. And what was he going to tell the police? That he knew that James had beaten up the man 6 months ago and that he didn't stop him, so that would make him an accomplice. And what about seeing Taliek as they were leaving the parking garage, where he and his father had beaten-up a guy over a parking space.  
  
He felt relief when he looked at his watch and noticed that in five minutes the day was going to end.  
  
Lulu entered the hospital. She saw Alvin and walked over to talk to him. He explained what Nick had told him, emphasizing that Nick didn't give too many details.  
  
"Nick?" She asked. "What has Nick got to do with this?"  
  
"He found them. In fact, I think he is a bit shaken by it. Maybe you should talk to him. You know he listens to you."  
  
"Where is he? He seemed strange on the phone. He never said that he was the one who found them."  
  
"You know Nick. He's in the waiting room. Just stay with him. He looks like crap."  
  
She didn't hear the last words. She just ran towards the waiting room to find him. Nick needed her and she hadn't realized it over the phone. She had treated him badly for a while. But, Nick was always a big question mark. She never knew what to expect from him. He never would say what he thought or felt, then suddenly, that afternoon, he told her he loved her. She had been so surprised that she couldn't think of what to say.  
  
She saw him sitting there like a small boy gazing off in the distance. Nick looked up as she neared. She sat down next to him and hugged him hard trying to comfort him. He was cold and didn't respond immediately to her touch. She began to caress his back with a firm and constant motion.  
  
Nick felt her warm hug and his blood began to circulate again. He wished for time to stop and this moment to last forever. He felt her soft hands on his back as he surrounded her with his arms, never wanting to feel lonely or empty again.  
  
Lulu pulled away from him gently, ending that intimate moment. She took his hands in hers and said, "Hey."  
  
Nick responded. "Mmm.?"  
  
"You forgot to tell me something on the phone," she said, trying to be as gentle as she could.  
  
"I'm sorry. I just. I didn't feel like chatting. Sorry." He raised his hand and pushed the hair off her face.  
  
"Okay. Do you need anything?" He seemed so vulnerable. She hadn't seen Nick like that before. His gray-green eyes where shining. God, he was so beautiful. How could a man like Nick 'see' her when he was always surrounded by pretty blonde girls. And then he had told her that he loved her. How.? She didn't know. It was hard to believe he would pick her over them. Her.? Why? She remembered what she had told him. that. 'Brian never looks at me the way you do.' It was. 'is' true. He looked at her as though she was the only person in the room.  
  
Nick was trying to figure out what Lulu was thinking. She was abstract in her thoughts.  
  
"Are you okay?" Lulu was a little shaken by his words.  
  
"Me? Yes, yes, I'm good. I'm. I'm concerned about you. How do you feel?"  
  
"Fine. Well. I'm. I'm gonna be all right. I'm just tired." Again he pictured the man in the garage. wondering how he was doing.  
  
"I can take you home.if you want. I mean."  
  
"Yes. Will you stay with me a bit? I mean. if you don't have to. you know, do something at." he glanced at his watch. ".at 1:00 o'clock in the morning on a Friday night?" He half smiled.  
  
She laughed. "Sure, I think a can rearrange my agenda. Don't worry."  
  
Nick gave her the most beautiful smile then took her hand and walked her to the exit.  
  
He saw Alvin and walked over to him.  
  
"If you need. you know. anything. call me. Okay? Whatever, it doesn't matter the time. Okay?"  
  
Touched by the offer, Alvin said, "I will. I will. Go and rest a bit? Lulu you are taking him, aren't you?"  
  
"Yes. I'll make sure he arrives in one piece."  
  
"Okay. Bye then. See you both tomorrow." Nick started to walk away. "Oh. Nick? Nick?"  
  
Nick turned around, still holding Lulu's hand. "Yes?"  
  
"Thanks. you know for. everything. Uhh."  
  
"I did nothing, Alvin. I just wish I could've done. you know. more. I. I'm sorry about Larry."  
  
Lulu raised her hand and touched his hair as though he was a little boy. Alvin was so surprised at that gesture.  
  
"You did what you could. It's not your fault. James was really lucky you were there. Now go and rest."  
  
"Yeah. thanks. I'll see you tomorrow."  
  
Nick and Lulu walked out of the hospital as Alvin watched them go. He thought about the day he met Nick for the first time. He didn't like him at all and now. well, Nick had changed.  
  
At that moment, Laurie arrived. She hugged him and said some nice word in his ear. For the first time, all night he felt comforted.  
  
Lulu and Nick arrived at his house. He had been quiet the whole ride home- lost in his thoughts. He opened the door and waited for her while she set the car's alarm.  
  
She had never been in Nick's house before. He turned the lights on and she entered. 'Beautiful place,' she thought.  
  
He sat down on the couch and waited while she looked around a bit, curious about the house. She finally sat down next to him.  
  
Nick looked at her, intensely.  
  
"You. are. you are staying, aren't you?" He didn't want her to leave. He wanted her with him. He was afraid of what he might do if she left. maybe drugs, get drunk. He just knew he didn't want to be there alone. not tonight.  
  
"Yes, I am." She wasn't sure what had happened but he was acting a bit strange and she was not leaving him alone. She noticed he was happy with her answer.  
  
Suddenly he just laid down and put his head on her lap. She was so surprise by this that she didn't move. He looked like a child-so lonely, so fragile. She touched his hair and he closed his eyes.  
  
Nick felt her hand on his hair. His mom used to do that when he was a child. He used to be scared of the dark. Anne used to sit on his bed and stay there till he was asleep, touching his hair or singing to him very softly. At that moment, on the couch, he felt safe like he hadn't felt in a long, long time.  
  
"Nick.?"  
  
"Yes?" he said, opening his eyes. "Am I bothering.? I'm.'cause."  
  
"No. No stay. I just want you to know something."  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Well. I. want you to know. that. I was a little insecure. today. I've been a little confused and. Well, I didn't know. what to say. You know, in the office."  
  
Feeling the pain return, Nick said, "You don't have to explain yourself, okay? Just forget about it. I. I don't want to talk about that now. Please. just not now."  
  
"But."  
  
"Lulu."  
  
"I love you, too. Okay?"  
  
Nick removed his head from her lap and looked at her-shocked.  
  
"You. said. What?"  
  
She said, smiling, "You heard me. She gave him a very soft kiss and laid his head back in her lap. He closed his eyes and felt the sweet softness of sleep engulf him. With Lulu's arms around him and the sweet smell of her perfume, he was being swept away to the beautiful world of dreams.  
  
"Don't leave tonight," he said, thinking that he didn't deserve her love. He didn't deserve her at all, but he loved her too much to let her go-he needed her so much. He was wondering how he had survived without her so long.  
  
"I won't." She moved his head from her lap and got up.  
  
"Lulu, stay with me." He was barely awake.  
  
"Yes, Nick. always." She laid down beside him and held him close. "No matter what."  
  
THE END! 


End file.
